negativity sucks.

*Disclaimer... I wrote this two days before publishing it.  I'm feeling much better now.  I guess sometimes I do just have to reflect on my feelings and pray about it*

negativity sucks.

I've been feeling pretty negative the last few days.  I hate when I feel negative, but I also acknowledge that maybe I just need to feel this way right now.  So, I usually let myself because I know I'll get over it and I know everything will be fine.

As excited as I was to begin summer, I'm that unexcited to go back to work.  I hate writing that because I'm a teacher and teachers are supposed to love their jobs.  It's not that I don't enjoy teaching, because I do.  The problem is- as much as I love my job, I love my son more and it's hard to not be with him all day (especially after being with him all day, all summer).  So, I do like my job. I like teaching kids. I like my co-workers, and I know as soon I get back into the flow of work I'll be fine.  Plus, really, what do I have to complain about?  I'll be on maternity leave in less than 3 months.  Unfortunately, I'm feeling a little negative about that too.  This time around, I know how quick it'll go and I can't even imagine how hard it'll be to leave two babies after knowing how hard it was to leave one.

Anyway... I hate when people say negative stuff because I always think- "hey, it could be so much worse."  I have to remind myself that I'm complaining about things that some people don't have the luxury to complain about... So I will remind myself...

I'll list ten reasons why I should get over my negativity...
Here it goes...

1.  I have a job- that I enjoy- in my field- that pays decent- has decent hours- affords me time off for holidays- provides my family health benefits- and allows me to make a difference from time to time :-)

2.  I have a beautiful baby boy- who I love more than I could ever describe in normal words.

3.  I'm having a little girl- who I will love more than I could ever describe in normal words.

4.  My pregnancy has been pretty easy so far.  I'm able to continue my life normally- no bed rest for me :-)

5.  I have a wonderful, supportive husband who will be able to be home to watch my little boy so that I don't have to take him to daycare.

6.  I have a wonderful, supportive husband that I love enough to miss during the day.

7.  I really do like my co-workers and I'm happy to see them again after summer.

8.  I have an option.  I live in a country where I can work, where I can have children,  where I can have children and work at the same time.

9.  If time stopped and it stayed the summer of 2012 forever, I wouldn't get to take Peyton trick-or-treating, I wouldn't get to meet Harper, I wouldn't get to eat Thanksgiving dinner, I wouldn't get to open presents on Christmas with my family, I wouldn't turn 27... guess I could live without that... the point is.. I must move on.  Plus, I'm really looking forward to fall this year and going to the pumpkin patch, drinking hot chocolate, and wearing boots :-)

and last... 10.  I shouldn't be negative because it's a waste of time and what good will come from it.

Nothing.  at. all. 

So, that's it.  I've allowed myself to be negative for the last few days, but I think I'll try to wrap it up by tomorrow.  I'll try to stop crying every time I look at this picture...

(well, that might not happen but I'll blame it on hormones)

and read a little more of this...

what 18 months looks like on Peyton

Peyton is 18 months... (actually 18 month, 3 weeks, and 3 days)

And today was his 18 month check up...

The Stats:

Weight: 25 lbs 9 oz- 41%

Height:  34.5 in- 93%

Head: 48 cm- 52%

So, we have a tall, skinny, little man on our hands

 The doctor said he looks great and he's so tough he cried for less than 30 seconds after getting 3 shots in the leg :-/  He's a trooper.

The doctor did say we need to cut out this...

So we will.... try.

I love you my big boy.  Everyday.

Independence Day with my independent boy

This year, like last year, we spent the 4th of July downtown.  This year, however, it was HOT!  So we left for a little and ate dinner in an air conditioned restaurant.  I would say it was a good move.

This was the 4th last year...

Peyton was 6 months old.  Now he's 18 months old and July 4th was a whole different experience.

He's such a big boy!

He rode a pony for the first time!

He played with the petting zoo animals.

 He gave his dad a workout by slowly crawling and then darting out past the "don't go past this line" sign.  Luckily the Police officer was nice about it.

 As it got darker, he waited patiently.... (with the help of food and bottles)

And finally! (at 9:30!) he watched the fireworks with Mama!  He did make sure my hands were around his waist at all times, but he never cried or fussed once :-)

Hello Pink!

Hello pink and purple...

Hello girly dresses and tights...

Hello Cinderella, Belle, and Ariel...

Hello flowers, bows, future boobs, periods, and boys... uhh? Pray for me :-)

Hello beautiful baby girl.  

Harper @ 21w- 13oz

We love you... and can't wait for you to be here.

summer does not equal summer without a trip to the beach

What did we do last week?  We went to the beach! 

Thanks to family, we had a place to stay for five nights and Peyton seemed to really like his first time playing in the sand and ocean.  Here are a few pictures to prove it.

Sometimes he hung out with Dada

Sometime he played with Mama

He even struck a pose for Baby Gap (just kidding, but this could be on the website- right!)

At the end of each morning, he was wiped out, ready for lunch, bath, and nap time.

     Our evenings were spent at the boardwalk, relaxing, me doing homework, eating and a little shopping.  Peyton didn't love the water on the first day (it was pretty cold), but the weather heated up and Peyton became fearless- as usual.  He even picked up dead baby crabs and neatly placed them on my shoulder after watching his dad do it.  

In 6 days, Peyton will be 18 months old!  In 5 days, we find out if he'll be a big brother to a little brother or sister.  I can't even believe he won't be the baby anymore.  He's getting to be so big and so smart.  Next year he'll be showing his little brother or sister how to play in the ocean!