welcome to the world harper

my beautiful little girl

was born on November 12, 2012 at 9:19am

she weighed 6 lbs 15 oz and measured 19 inches

She's perfect and we're so blessed.

Her brother seriously adores her.  He's not jealous.  He rubs her hair and reaches out to hold her.  He worries when she cries and wants to know where she is when he can't see her.  He loves her.

Now that we're home, we're adjusting to having two babies (under two).  It's not easy, but I didn't expect it to be.  I'm just lucky I have Brandon, because I seriously don't think I could do this without him.

Welcome to our world baby girl.

normal around here

We've been busy getting ready for Harper and enjoying the fall.  This year like the last few, we visited a local farm in the area.  Peyton was old enough this year to participate in the activities and run around the pumpkin field.

When we got home, I let Peyton paint his pumpkin.  He seemed like he really liked painting it and he wasn't too messy about it either :-)

Two days before Halloween, Hurricane Sandy hit our area.  It was actually bad enough to close school for two days.  We lost power for a little less than 24 hours.  But things quickly resumed to normal on Halloween.  Unfortunately, that wasn't the case for everyone hit by Sandy :-(

Today is Election Day.  Brandon, Peyton and I went to vote early this morning.  I had the day off, but I had a ton to do to prepare for my leave.  I feel good knowing that Peyton will learn about the election process from a young age (part of the territory when your mom is a social studies teacher).

And today I had my last doctor appointment before Harper arrives!  It's pretty amazing.

34 wks and 21 months

     I turned 34 weeks on Friday!  And... I finally made a decision about Harper's delivery.  If all goes well, she will be here on November 12.  I'm excited, nervous, a little overwhelmed, and a little unconvinced that I'm even having a baby.  I think Peyton's ready... but I could be wrong.  He lays his head on my belly and rubs Harper for several minutes at a time.  He smiled yesterday and laughed when I told him he was going to have his sister here soon!  I hope some part of him really does understand.  I'm ready to be home for the holidays and to not have to worry about work or school.   I still haven't completely set up Harper's room and I don't have everything that I plan to have for her, but as for her room- here are my ideas so far...

I love this dandelion blanket from etsy

I really want this chandelier from etsy and am still debating if it's worth the cost

I'm pretty set on this crib from Ikea

  We bought a dresser from a great consignment shop in the area.  I guess I'm still looking for a rug, nursery art, curtains, and little things like a lamp.  I really wish I had the time (and money) to get it all together, but I've become comfortable with knowing that I don't have the time right now or energy.  It'll get done- eventually.  If I hadn't had Peyton 5 weeks early, I'd think I have plenty of time, but having a child early changes your perspective some. 

     On another note, I'm excited for Halloween (Peyton is going to be Batman this year- he's never seen Batman, but he looks really cute in his costume).  I'm looking forward to visiting the farm and pumpkin patch- and I'll post pictures when we do.  Peyton is exactly 21 months old today and he is just becoming so smart and so fun.  He's still my little boy and probably will be forever.

I have a blog??

I have not been a very good blogger lately.  Here's a quick recap (for memory keeping purposes) of what's been going on the last few weeks.

1.  I started work again.  My 5th year.  I'm getting old.

2.  Today I am 30 weeks pregnant.  I had an appointment yesterday and she is doing fine.  I am doing fine.  No protein, no high blood pressure.  I think I've put on about 15 lbs, but I still pretty small for 30 weeks, so I'm not worried about it.  I've been debating whether to have a repeat c-section or vbac... I don't really know what to do?

3.  Today Peyton turned 20 months old.  I went to get him from his nap this afternoon and he was wearing his hat.  He loves hats.  He is saying a ton of words.  He even raps :-)  and... he says Harper.

4. I started another class in the Master program I'm pursuing.  It's A LOT of work and I don't feel like finishing- but I will.. because I have to.

5.  Brandon got a new job.  He hasn't officially started, but he will soon.  He was made for this job.  I'm pretty sure he has found God's purpose for his life.  He's been pretty amazing.

6.  I got baptized in our church.  I was nervous, but I really wanted to.  I want people to know I'm really trying to live my life in a certain way and hold me accountable to it.  Brandon baptized me and it felt really special.

Not too much else is new.  Just planning- government and history lessons, baby shower, Halloween costumes, Christmas decorations, Peyton's bday party, my delivery... you know, the usual :-)  Hopefully I'll have a more substantial post next time.  We'll see how things go....

negativity sucks.

*Disclaimer... I wrote this two days before publishing it.  I'm feeling much better now.  I guess sometimes I do just have to reflect on my feelings and pray about it*

negativity sucks.

I've been feeling pretty negative the last few days.  I hate when I feel negative, but I also acknowledge that maybe I just need to feel this way right now.  So, I usually let myself because I know I'll get over it and I know everything will be fine.

As excited as I was to begin summer, I'm that unexcited to go back to work.  I hate writing that because I'm a teacher and teachers are supposed to love their jobs.  It's not that I don't enjoy teaching, because I do.  The problem is- as much as I love my job, I love my son more and it's hard to not be with him all day (especially after being with him all day, all summer).  So, I do like my job. I like teaching kids. I like my co-workers, and I know as soon I get back into the flow of work I'll be fine.  Plus, really, what do I have to complain about?  I'll be on maternity leave in less than 3 months.  Unfortunately, I'm feeling a little negative about that too.  This time around, I know how quick it'll go and I can't even imagine how hard it'll be to leave two babies after knowing how hard it was to leave one.

Anyway... I hate when people say negative stuff because I always think- "hey, it could be so much worse."  I have to remind myself that I'm complaining about things that some people don't have the luxury to complain about... So I will remind myself...

I'll list ten reasons why I should get over my negativity...
Here it goes...

1.  I have a job- that I enjoy- in my field- that pays decent- has decent hours- affords me time off for holidays- provides my family health benefits- and allows me to make a difference from time to time :-)

2.  I have a beautiful baby boy- who I love more than I could ever describe in normal words.

3.  I'm having a little girl- who I will love more than I could ever describe in normal words.

4.  My pregnancy has been pretty easy so far.  I'm able to continue my life normally- no bed rest for me :-)

5.  I have a wonderful, supportive husband who will be able to be home to watch my little boy so that I don't have to take him to daycare.

6.  I have a wonderful, supportive husband that I love enough to miss during the day.

7.  I really do like my co-workers and I'm happy to see them again after summer.

8.  I have an option.  I live in a country where I can work, where I can have children,  where I can have children and work at the same time.

9.  If time stopped and it stayed the summer of 2012 forever, I wouldn't get to take Peyton trick-or-treating, I wouldn't get to meet Harper, I wouldn't get to eat Thanksgiving dinner, I wouldn't get to open presents on Christmas with my family, I wouldn't turn 27... guess I could live without that... the point is.. I must move on.  Plus, I'm really looking forward to fall this year and going to the pumpkin patch, drinking hot chocolate, and wearing boots :-)

and last... 10.  I shouldn't be negative because it's a waste of time and what good will come from it.

Nothing.  at. all. 

So, that's it.  I've allowed myself to be negative for the last few days, but I think I'll try to wrap it up by tomorrow.  I'll try to stop crying every time I look at this picture...

(well, that might not happen but I'll blame it on hormones)

and read a little more of this...